I’ve been divorced for a few years now. I’ve been dating people on and off, but you could say I’m stuck in the daily routine of life—I go to work, I hang out with friends, or I work out. For the most part, I’m happy. Every once in a while, though, when I’m driving home from work and I take the bridge that used to take me to the home we made together, or when a certain song comes on, I’m reminded of my ex wife. I get overcome by this awful feeling of missing her. It’s not sexual—definitely not—it’s more similar to how I miss my kids, except not quite as bad. She feels a lot of anger towards me and the choices I made, though. So, I very much doubt she ever misses me.
I was 23 when I met my now ex, 25 when I married her, and 27 when we had our first kid. Looking back, I realize that I hardly had the mental capacity to make big life decisions then—and yet we did. At first, I would say things were going well. We did a lot of silly but important things together, like we’d watch movies or TV shows that we both loved, we’d bond over music, or we’d cook together. We had sex probably twice a week at that point. But then twice a week turned into twice a month, and even less. And then, at one point, it completely stopped. We went without sex for two years.
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